The Hunchback of Nob Hill

And other tales of apartment hunting in San Francisco...

I've been seriously looking for an apartment for about three weeks now. My free hours are spent checking craigslist, emailing, calling, setting up showings, going to open houses, and generally stressing out over whether I'll ever find the perfect place or if I should just settle on something mediocre. And if I have to settle, what's more important to me? Newness? Neighborhood? After liking and losing three places already to fierce competition, I'm starting to worry.

The height of my housing frustrations was last Friday, when I was brought to tears in a leasing office. Really. I had the day off work, four showings lined up that morning, and I was DETERMINED to find a place that day. The first appointment called me an hour before to let me know he had already rented the place. When I made it to the second showing, the guy told me he had just rented that one too. The third appointment didn't even show up. I arrived at the fourth one looking and feeling desperate, and I was informed that it had just been rented that morning. Of course it had. My eyes started tearing up, and I managed to squeak out, "Ok, well, will you have anything else opening up before the end of August?" One was opening up August 6th and hadn't been listed yet, and I got a showing for the next morning at 9am.

As I was leaving that place, I got a call back from a building manager (Dennis) in Nob Hill, and we set up a showing for 5pm. I was hopeful. It sounded like a nice place, but I was a little worried about the neighborhood. Lower Nob Hill gets kind of sketchy.

The outside of the building was pretty gross, and I held the phone receiver a few inches away from my ear as I called him to buzz me in. The buzzer didn't work, so he came down to open the door. Dennis was in his mid-forties, wiry, leathery, tattoed, slightly musty smelling, and a hunchback. He took me up to the fourth floor in an elevator that was older than I am, with the doors you close manually. All I could think of was being caught in that elevator during an earthquake like the one we had the night before, and falling to my death.

When he opened the doors, we were about three feet below the floor, and for a moment I thought he was going to make me climb out of the elevator. But he closed the doors, pushed the button again, and brought us up to about five inches below the floor. "Watch your step," he said as he led me out to the dim hallway.

The actual apartment unit wasn't bad, but the entire package, for the rent he was asking, was definitely a no.

On Saturday, I went back for my 9am showing and loved the place. Big building with laundry, a 4th floor outdoor pool and BBQ area, workout facility, new kitchen and bathroom, great closet space...I was in. I filled out an application and got the ball rolling. The neighborhood wasn't great, but it was close to a lot of my favorite spots in the city, and it had a 24 hour doorman and underground parking. Today at work, I told everyone about my new place, and they freaked out. Yes, it's a slightly sketchy neighborhood during the day, but apparently it's REALLY bad at night. No wonder the rent was so low.

I haven't signed a lease on it yet, so it looks like I'm back on craigslist again for awhile. Spreading the word with anyone and everyone I know in the city, so hopefully I'll get something by word of mouth.

I'm not sure how much more of this I can take.